I do not call myself an introvert or an extrovert. I don’t even know what that means.
But one thing is for sure: when I start a conversation, it does not start with an intention. Most of the time, at least. Neither do I care what the conversation would lead to.
I have met people who could change my life in a day.
But my goal was not to get anything out of them.
My goal was to have a real conversation. Regardless of anything.
I do not have networking skills.
What does that even mean, anyway?
Isn’t it just talking to someone based on what they could offer — and keeping that connection alive in order to get benefited?
In this world, skills are discovered when you have a strong network.
That’s the requirement of these times.
But some skills are timeless:
Being honest to yourself.
Integrity.
A humble attitude.
Good intention.
And most of all — building knowledge, even if it is not your daily part or subject.
Here’s what I’ve noticed:
People chase networking like it’s a strategy. A system. A skill to master.
They walk into a room already calculating: What can this person do for me? How do I keep this connection alive so I benefit later?
I’ve never been able to do that.
When I talk to someone, I’m just talking to them.
Not to their title. Not to their opportunity. Not to what they could open up for me down the line.
Just to them.
And ironically, that’s when the real connections happen.
Not because I was working an angle. Not because I was strategic.
But because a real conversation — one without a hidden agenda — is rare. And people feel that difference immediately.
Networking, as most people practice it, is transactional.
It’s built on a question: What do I get from this relationship?
But honesty, integrity, humility, curiosity — these aren’t transactional. They don’t ask what they’ll get back.
They’re just who you are, regardless of who’s in front of you.
And that’s the part that doesn’t go out of style.
Trends change. Industries change. What’s “in demand” changes every few years.
But someone who is honest with themselves — that never becomes irrelevant.
Someone with integrity — that never becomes irrelevant.
Someone who stays humble, stays curious, keeps building knowledge outside their own lane — that person adapts to anything, because their value was never tied to one skill or one network.
So maybe I don’t have networking skills.
Maybe I just have conversations.
And maybe, over time, that’s built something stronger than any strategy ever could — because it was never about what I could extract.
It was about who I was, talking to whoever was in front of me.
To anyone who feels like they’re “bad at networking”:
Maybe you’re not bad at it.
Maybe you just don’t want to talk to people like they’re opportunities.
And maybe that instinct — to have a real conversation instead of a strategic one — is worth more than any networking skill anyone could teach you.